"How To Choose The Right One"
Living in the microwave generation of wanting it yesterday, no one wants to waste
their time on a dead end endeavor. This is no more truer than in the love department. As a result, there have been
countless compatibility tests, love tests, soul mate quizzes and anything else that can help you find your partner
without having to endure a barrage of losers. Can you really find your match by taking a test? Who determines the
perimeters of the questions and who analyzes the answers? There are some tests that give a pretty good
indication as far as medical diagnoses are concerned, but can you gage compatibility that way?
If you want to risk ending your relationship in record speed, trying
to self diagnose it with a test is a sure fire way to do it. At least one where you expect your mate to
be a willing participant. If you want to see if you're compatible with your partner, you need to
ease into assessing what you have. You should seek to find out not just what you have in common, but why you
have those things in common. The two of you should complement each other without trying. Any compromising should be
with little teeth grinding as possible. You don't necessarily have to like the same things or have that
much in common. You should, however, have the underlying desire to enhance the
Forcing the other to go out more or dress different or act out side of their character is a sure
sign that you're not very compatible. If you're wanting a more outward display of compatibility like physical
attraction, yet, your mate looks for a more soulful connection, you really may want to reconsider if you want
to continue down the road you're on. Usually people who are at odds on that level are depriving
themselves of an essential need in order to stay with the other. Superficial attraction and cerebral attraction can
spark a heart response to love; but most of the time those differenced are best kept within a short
term relationship. Don't look for a life partner with differences of those extremes. You could make great
friends or friends with benefits, but don't try to get too deep with that connection.
If you really want to find out if you're compatible, you're going to have to make yourself
vulnerable to possibly getting hurt. The up side to that is you wont have invested huge amounts of time and
entangled your heart in something that was bound to eventually end anyway. It's not to say that you
weren't compatible. It just wasn't a life partner. I think many people miss out on opportunities to grow by trying
to hard to instantly find the holy grail of partners every time they encounter someone. You run the risk
of turning away someone who could have been a great relationship companion had you not rushed the
process. Early concerns may not necessarily mean you don't work well together. It could only be an adjustment
between relationships or that you've been out of practice so long that you're rusty when it comes to
spotting a good fit.
Think of all the great relationships there are that would not have seen the light of day had the
other partner known about some quirk or other that only showed itself after you connected deeply
with your mate. Yet, the thing that would have surely stopped you in your tracks in the beginning is not
even a speed bump in relation to the contentment and happiness you share as a result of building your
relationship. Having said that, it should be even clearer that any compatibility test should factor in long
term indicators that only make you aware that you made a good choice with your mate. If you're observant, you
can tell yourself that you and your partner make a good fit for each other.
If you still want to venture down that road and see if your relationship has stickiness
to it, then make very well sure that you are an extremely analytical person. Dissect any question down to its
root intention. Every question does not have an easy yes or no answer. You have to know how to
keep any and all question relevant to the topic. Don't let something that could be fun, informing and helpful
turn into world war three. The most revealing compatibility test will be the one that begins with you knowing
yourself and being honest with what you know. But that's another test in itself.